为了提高
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Only people who earn a lot of money are successful. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Many people believe that a large income equals success. I believe, however, that success is more than how much money you make. Some of those measures of success include fame, respect, and knowledge.
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首段，第一句话提出背景，讲出了作者的观点，第二句话继续对作者的观点进行简单拓展。 |
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首段为文章提供了背景，陈述了作者论点，并进行了简单的分析。 |
Most people assume that famous people are rich people, but that isn’t always true. For example, some day I would like to be a famous researcher. Few scientists are rich by today’s standards. Still I will consider myself successful if I am well-known, regardless of my personal wealth. Additionally, there are many famous humanitarians who are not rich, one of whom was the legendary Mother Teresa was one. Certainly, no one would say she was not successful.
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本段是一个总分的结构。开头提出论点，即声名与财富并不是时时等同。后面对论点进行了进一步解释，举例有名的研究者，科学家，或者是人类学家用现代的标准来衡量，根本不能算作是富翁，但他们都是成功的。 |
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本段是文章第二段，提出了正文的第一个支持论点。 |
I also believe that being respected by coworkers indicates success. Without that respect, money means little. For example, I once did some work for a senior attorney in a prestigious law firm. He made a very good salary, but he wasn’t a nice man, and he did not engender much respect amongst the other members of the firm. No one ever did work for him willingly. He orderd everyone around, and we didn’t respect him. In contrast, I had a wonderful band director in high school who had to take extra jobs just to make enough money to support his family. However, his students had great respect for him and always listened to what he said. As a result, we were a very good band, and he had the respect of the band and the school. In my opinion, my band director was more successful than the attorney.
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总分的结构，开头提出论点，即如果在工作上能赢得同行同事的尊重也算是一种成功。接下来作者举了两个自己亲身经历的事例来对比证明，受到尊重相比于赚得更多来说是一种更高意义上的成功。 |
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本段是文章第三段，提出了正文的第二个支持论点。 |
Finally, I think one of the most important indicators of success is knowledge. Wealthy people don’t know all the answers. For example, in the movie Good Will Hunting, the only person who could solve some of the most complex problems was the janitor. He knew a lot, and decided what he wanted to do with that knowledge rather than just think about money. In my opinion, he was extremely successful, or at least had great potential to be so. Luckily, he chose to apply his talent.
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总分的结构，开头提出论点，即衡量是否成功的关键是一个人的学识。然后举例电影里面的角色所经历的事情，来形象地佐证。 |
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本段是文章第四段，提出了正文的第三个支持论点。 |
When we think of history, there are few people that we remember simply because they were rich. Overall, we remember people who did something with their lives - they might have been influential in politics, or contributed to science or art or religion. If history is the ultimate judge of success, then money surely isn’t everything.
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第一句话回顾历史，能让人们铭记的并不是有钱人，而是脚踏实地在工作上出色的人们。最后总结，历史会证明一切，包括到底什么是成功。 |
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本段是文章的尾段，承接了上文，总结了观点，并重新陈述了作者立场。 |
满分要素剖析
一、语言表达
1、Many people believe that a large income equals success. I believe, however, that success is more than how much money you make. 表示等于，等同用equal，表示不只是，不仅是，这里用了more than，它还有超过，多于的意思，这里展示了它的另一种用法。
2、Still I will consider myself successful if I am well-known, regardless of my personal wealth. 这句话里作者用了consider表示认为，觉得，在文中作者还用了believe，assume，think等词语表示相似的意思，都是提出自己的看法或者假设。Regardless of表示不管不顾，相似的结构有in spite of和despite。
3、In contrast, I had a wonderful band director in high school who had to take extra jobs just to make enough money to support his family. 开头用in contrast提示对比，表示相比之下，并且更偏向“与此相反”的意义，后面常接with/to。
4、Overall, we remember people who did something with their lives - they might have been influential in politics, or contributed to science or art or religion. 首先表示“总的来说”，用overall，在这里是表示概括总结的副词。might have been表示对过去行动的推测。 contribute to表示贡献，有助于，促进的意思，这个词组还有其它的意义，大家可以留心发掘，注意区别。
二、逻辑结构
全文采用了总分总的结构，从三个方面正面支撑自己的观点，分别是从名声，尊重和学识的角度说明这些因素在作者来看都是财富所不能衡量的，或者是坐拥财富所能比拟的。在文中，作者用了自己的真实经历或者见闻来具体地展开说明，也列举了众所周知的名人来支撑自己的伦点，让文章更充实生动，并且具有说服力。具体到每个分论点，有的是举两个相反事例对比说明，有的是直接举反面事例来推出正面论点，也有直接从正面进行的例证，手法多样。
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