为了提高
Many people have a close relationship with their pets. These people treat their birds, cats, or other animals as members of their family. In your opinion, are such relationships good? Why or why not? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Many people have close relationships with their pets. They treat their birds, cats, or other animals as members of their family. Though there are some disagreements with this practice, this kind of relationship has some merits.
First, pets are good companions. We live and work in crowded cities, but we are far from each other indeed. We often have busy schedules, so we call our parents and friends to say hello to them instead of visiting them. From time to time, we feel lonely. In this situation, pets are the ideal companions for us. We can talk to them, though they do not speak our language. In fact, some pets, such as dogs, can read our mood. When we get angry, they will be good, murmuring near us. Besides, spending time taking care of pets is a good way of relieving our loneliness. Think of those parents, whose children are out to study, they generally feel lonely. They feel lonely not because their children are away from them but because they have too much time. If we can concentrate on something, such as taking care of our pets, we will not feel lonely any longer. Pets can not only accompany us but also keep us busy, that is the point?
Second, keeping pets helps to foster children. The size of a family is getting smaller and smaller, and most of the families are nuclear families, that is, only parents and their children in a family. In China, a couple generally has only one child. Children are the center of these families; they know little about taking care of someone else. They need to learn how to cooperate with others, too. In this case, keeping pets helps to foster children. While taking care of pets, children will learn to be patient, considerate and responsible. They will also have a better understanding of what their parents have done for them. They will be thankful. Such characteristics as being patient, responsible and thankful are crucial for the child’s future.
Pets are not simply pets, but our special friends. As long as we consider the merits of keeping them, we will be glad to treat them as family members.
满分要素剖析
一、 语言表达
1. Think of those parents, whose children are out to study, they generally feel lonely. They feel lonely not because their children are away from them but because they have too much time. 这两句话写得都很精彩。首先第一句话中主句为前半句,是个祈使句,后半部分是个定语从句whose children are out to study, they generally feel lonely.在定语从句中whose作定语修饰children。第二句话一个句式结构not because…but because… 这句话在深度上也非常有卓见,父母感到孤独并不是因为与子女的相处时间太少,而是他们自己的空闲时间太多,人老了也就彻底闲下来了,不知道做什么事了,只能孤独期盼子女的归来。作者从反面说明这一点顿时让读者心中由生佩服之意。
2. Pets can not only accompany us but also keep us busy, that is the point? If we can concentrate on something, such as taking care of our pets, we will not feel lonely any longer. 这里的第一句话用了not only…but also 这样的英文关联词,说明两个宠物对于人来说非常重要的东西,一是陪伴,二是让我们忙碌,但值得一提的是,not only…but also连接的前后两部分重要性是有区分的,重点强调的是后面的but also. 所以作者所强调的是pets帮助我们busy,这是最重要的。第二句话是对于第一句话的解释,因为忙碌,所以人们就更容易把注意力集中到某地,而不再觉得孤单。这有点像人们在失恋后非常喜欢忙碌的工作,为的是就转移注意力。
3. The size of a family is getting smaller and smaller, and most of the families are nuclear families, that is, only parents and their children in a family.这里需要注意的一种表达是nuclear family意思为核心家庭,也就是小家庭的意思。之后作者对这个表达作出解释,即only parents and their children in a family.
4. While taking care of pets, children will learn to be patient, considerate and responsible.第一句话是个省略主语和be动词的状语从句,由于从句与主句主语一致,所以省略掉。这句话本身对应的也非常工整,请看接下来的语句Such characteristics as being patient, responsible and thankful are crucial for the child’s future. 形容词的重复对应再次强调了它们的重要性。
二、 逻辑结构
本文逻辑结构清晰明了,一共分为四个段落来陈述。先后论证了pets给人类带来的各种好处。除去首段和尾段,作者在正文部分分别用正正的结构。首先第一段作者提出pets对人类有一些好处。这就暗示着在接下来的正文段落作者要一一论述这些merits。果然,作者在第二段首句就提到First, pets are good companions. 这里说明了养宠物的第一个好处,就是在人孤单时可以陪伴的朋友。第三段作者提到Second, keeping pets helps to foster children. 这里又是另一个好处,即对孩子潜移默化的影响,培养孩子的责任心。最后一段作者补充说明,即pets是人类特殊的朋友,人类应该把他们当成家庭成员一样看待。
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