为了提高
A friend of yours has received some money and plans to use all of it either * to go on vacation * to buy a car. Your friend has asked you for advice. Compare your friend's two choices and explain which one you think your friend should choose. Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.
Not surprisingly, what confuses us most is not how to earn money but how to spend it. Take a sum of money for example. We can use it either to go on a vacation or to buy a car. Which choice is better? The answer is different from person to person, but if my friend is not rich enough and has no extra money, I would recommend a car.
At first glance, it seems fairly reasonable to choose a vacation. We work for a living, 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. Though we have many weekends, we in fact are not able to enjoy a vacation in such a short period of time. We need a vacation to relax, because we always have a busy schedule. After a whole day of work, all we usually want to do is to do nothing at all. In addition, as most of us work and live in cities, we are literally isolated from the forests, rivers and fresh air of nature. Having a vacation enables us to have access to nature.
A vacation is an ideal choice, but an expensive vacation is still not realistic for us. We need to satisfy our immediate needs first. After all, a car can be extremely convenient. If we can drive to work, we do not have to be in a hurry in the morning, as driving takes much less time than taking a bus. We usually crowd into a bus, packed like sardines. We, too, have to wait in the rain or snow for a taxicab to come, which never appears when you need it terribly [when you really need it]. None of these things will bother us any longer if we have a car! What’s more, a car enables us to have trips more often, at least very short ones. Besides all these advantages, cars last much longer than many other things, and benefit everyone in the family. In a sense, they deserve [are worth] the money.
So the choice is a really a hard one. As for me, a car outweighs a vacation in general, because it is more practical in daily life. Maybe I will go on vacation when I have more money and time.
满分要素剖析
一、语言表达
1. Not surprisingly, what confuses us most is not how to earn money but how to spend it. 作为文章的开篇话，这句话作者写的非常有意思，在形式上作者对于题目给出的论题好像提出了困惑和质疑，内容上非常的诙谐幽默，提到怎么会有如何花钱的问题，一直以来困扰人们生活问题的是如何挣钱而不是花钱。之后作者顺着题目的意思一步步提出自己的观点。像Not surprisingly这种副词提前的写法也值得借鉴，在句子形式上做出了些变化，并且作者提出自己的困惑并不会让大多数人意外，因为大家也是这么想的，其语言幽默，思维缜密，紧紧抓住读者的眼睛，有想继续往下读的欲望。
2. We can use it either to go on a vacation or to buy a car. 这句话的亮点在于关联词either…or, 一般的写法是没有either，其实去掉并不影响句子意思，但是如果论那个写法更加高级，可以从细节上看得出either…or这种写法更为书面化，更有功底。
3. At first glance, it seems fairly reasonable to choose a vacation. We work for a living, 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. Though we have many weekends, we in fact are not able to enjoy a vacation in such a short period of time.这三句话前后的逻辑性及其强，分别来看，语言上也是可选可点的。首先，At first glance第一眼看上去，是表面上的意思，其中暗示着其真正的含义并非如此，所谓耳听为虚眼见也不一定为实就是这个道理。还有之后的seems也可以流露这个意思。第二句话中的work for a living, 8 hours a day, 5 days a week充分能体现上班族的辛苦程度，里面有细节支持，如8&5. 第三句话是个让步转折的句子，其中be able to意为有能力做某事，是客观上的能力，这里充分体现了作者对于工作辛苦和生活琐事的无奈之情。
4. In addition, as most of us work and live in cities, we are literally isolated from the forests, rivers and fresh air of nature. Having a vacation enables us to have access to nature.这里的副词literally用得非常恰当，literal本意为文字上的，或逐字逐句的，引申意为真正的，彻底的。这里比用really或completely要高级很多。这里还有个短语用法be isolated from是“与…隔绝”的意思，在这里作者惟妙惟肖地描写了城市中的人们远离了那些自然景观，非常可悲。与下一句话的have access to…是个搭配。
5. We usually crowd into a bus, packed like sardines.这里运用了比喻手法，把挤公交的人比作是沙丁鱼，还使用了过去分词作状语packed“堆积的”，与主句的crowd相对应。
二、逻辑结构
本文逻辑结构清晰明了，一共分为四个段落来论证观点。在正文部分，作者采用一反一正的写作手法，先从反面让步作者反面观点的合理性，之后非常自然地引入到正面观点，提出其更加合理并且实际的原因。具体来看，作者在第一段给出假设，谈到如果这个朋友不算富裕的话，那么选择买车是一种更加实际的方式。之后进入正文段落，也就是第二段，作者很客观地让步指出选择去度假好像是一种比较合理的方式。在第三段，作者提出买车的好处，这些好处甚至覆盖了去度假的好处，比如买车后可以去更多次的度假，比较自由，并且这种方式很经济。最后一段作者总结了上文的观点，说明虽然是个hard choice，但是一切应该从实际出发，对于比较穷的朋友还是先买车吧。
独立写作185题库是ETS公布的托福考试经典官方作文题库，收录在托福考试官方指南(Official Guide)的附录中，在托福考试改革之前，是作文真题的主要来源。现在的托福考试对官方作文题目进行了扩大，但是185题库仍然和考试作文真题紧密相连，为考生提供最权威最真实的托福范文参考和写作练习。SmartStudy的教学专家对185题库的逐题讲解，从考题精读，头脑风暴，范文展示，甚至是同类题型的归纳等多个方面切入，将平面简短的文题毁灭性地分崩离析，以思路指导清晰其面貌，以生动的观点和事例丰满其个性，提供更完整更立体的试题透视途径，准确击碎写作障碍。
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