为了提高
It has recently been announced that a new restaurant may be built in your neighborhood. Do you support or oppose this plan? Why? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.
I can see both advantages and disadvantages to having a new restaurant built in our neighborhood. I'm worried about traffic and how it will affect our neighborhood. However, I think that it will benefit local businesses and increase appreciation for our neighborhood. Overall, I think it is a good idea.
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本段是文章的首段，属于分总结构。首先提供了一些要讨论问题的背景和引入。接下来作者对此进行简单分析。进而得出作者自己对这个问题的看法和论点。 |
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本段是文章首段，对文章要讨论的内容提供了背景和社会上激烈讨论的话题，然后点明了作者立场，并提出论点。 |
Traffic congestion is always a concern when you build something new. Our streets are narrow, with parking on both sides. More cars traveling through the neighborhood could cause even more congestion. Traffic means parking problems, too. Our neighborhood has very few garages attached to the houses. Most of us depend on finding a space to park on the street. If the new restaurant is built, we’ll be competing for those spaces with the restaurant's patrons. Plus, if the restaurant offers valet parking, it'll be even worse. Valet parkers work in teams to grab every possible space available on the street.
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本段是一个总分结构，一开始就点明了本段的分论点，为后文论述进行了铺垫。后面都是展开了对这个分论点的详细分析举例。段落中间没有分层，结构比较简单。 |
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本段是文章的第二段，也就是正文第一段，不支持开设新餐馆。 |
I'm also concerned about the type of patrons this new restaurant will bring into our neighborhood. A family restaurant wouldn't be a problem. However, if it's going have a bar and dancing, then there could be problems. The restaurant would stay open later, and people leaving the restaurant might be drunk. Who wouldn't worry about rowdy customers staggering around our neighborhood in the early morning hours, looking for their cars?
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本段是一个总分结构，一开始就点明了本段的分论点，为后文论述进行了铺垫。后面都是展开了对这个分论点的详细分析。段内可以分成两个部分，第一个部分讲了family restaurant，又递进的说了酒吧的问题。 |
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本段是文章的第三段，也就是正文第二段，不支持开设新餐馆。 |
I have to admit, though, there are advantages to a new restaurant. Our neighborhood could certainly use the jobs the restaurant would provide. Not only that, the money neighborhood residents would earn there would likely be spent at other neighborhood businesses. This would give a boost to those businesses and make our neighborhood more prosperous. A new restaurant would also attract a lot of people to our neighborhood. They could see what a nice area this is and might attract new residents to the neighborhood. That would be a good thing because we've been losing residents in the suburbs the last couple of years.
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本段是一个总分结构。本段分为了两部分。第一部分：第一句话即点明了主旨。后面第二句话对主旨进行了简要分析。肯定了建立新餐馆的好处。第二部分：对建立新餐馆进行更详尽的利益分析，进而支持本段分论点。 |
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本段是文章的第四段，也就是正文第三段，支持了开设新餐馆。 |
There are a lot of factors to consider, but all in all, I support the idea of this new restaurant in our neighborhood.
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本段是文章的只有一句话，对上文进行了承接，重申论点。 |
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本段是文章的尾段，对上文进行了承接，并对论点进行了概括分析，最后重申论点，让文章更加立场明确。 |
满分因素剖析：
一、语言表达
文章很少使用长难句，都是使用的比较简单的句子，但是句式多变，作者使用了宾语从句，定语从句，状语从句的复合句，同时使用疑问句，使句子内容饱满，语气强烈。在用词方面，作者十分下功夫，使用了很多固定搭配的动词短语，使得表达准确而地道。同时，作者使用了很多高难词汇，让考官眼前一亮。
1. Traffic congestion is always a concern when you build something new.
本句中用到一个高级词汇congestion，意思是“堵塞，拥堵”，专门可以指“交通拥堵”。名词Concern的意思是“担心的事物”，可以用来指代问题的一方面，用来引出文章的的论点。另外，此句中还用到了一个副词，always，表示“总是”，暗含一种强烈的负面态度和语气。
2. Who wouldn't worry about rowdy customers staggering around our neighborhood in the early morning hours, looking for their cars?
本句中用到两个高级词汇stagger和rowdy。stagger做动词，意思是“步履蹒跚地走”，很生动的形容了喝醉的人在走路的状态，这是一般土鳖词汇“walk”无法做到的。形容词rowdy的意思是“粗暴的，吵闹的”，比一般形容吵闹的noisy更加生动形象。作者在短短一句中就用到了两个高级词汇，使得文章一下子上了一个档次。大家在托福作文的备考中也要注意高级词汇的积累。
3. I have to admit, though, there are advantages to a new restaurant.
动词短语“have to admit”的意思是“不得不承认”含有一种让步的语气。句中的though作为插入语出现，表达一种让步的态度。虽然在表示让步时可以用“though”和“although”，但although只能出现在句首，而though可以出现在句中的任何位置。
4. This would give a boost to those businesses and make our neighborhood more prosperous.
本句中用到两个高级词汇boost和prosperous。名词boost的意思是“急速上升”，动词短语give a boost to sth的意思是“使...急速上升”，同样的表达还有动词“promote”。但与promote相比，give a boost to sth这种动词加名词短语的固定搭配表达更加生动。形容词的prosperous的意思是“繁荣的”，是一个很大很好的词。
二、逻辑结构
采用了补正的欲扬先抑式的写法，这样的写法在考场上并不多见，比较有新意，第一段先提出了开餐馆的一些弊端，论述逻辑鲜明。文章很少使用长难句，都是使用的比较简单的句子，但是句式多变。而且，文章也没有使用过多的大词，难词，比起一些比较卖弄辞藻、故弄玄虚的文章来说，多了一分平实，也更加易懂。但是句式多变又让文章极具可读性。
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