为了提高
Do you agree or disagree with following statement? It is better to be a member of a group than to be the leader of a group. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In my opinion, it’s always better for me to be a leader than a follower. True leaders show initiative and others want to follow them. They take action and they assume responsibility. A leader is a decision maker. Some followers may approve of the decision, and others may complain about it, but these followers all chose to follow, not to lead. They chose not to make decisions, but to listen and be led. That’s how I’m different. I’m not a follower. I want to make decisions and adopt responsibility.
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首段,第一句话讲出了作者的观点,然后继续对作者的观点进行简单拓展。 |
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首段为文章提供了背景,陈述了作者论点,并进行了简单的分析。 |
Good leader do not react to events, but will anticipate them and seek for ways to gain from them. A leader will formulate a plan of action and then will persuade others to follow. For example, a class president at a local college may feel that the relationship between the community and the campus is not a good one. Local citizens may feel that the college kids make too much noise on the street, litter in public areas, and shop in other communities. A good class president will recognize that the community and the campus depend and rely on one another. The president will ask the student body to keep noise down, help clean up the neighborhoods, and work with businesses to attract students, and will persuade his fellow students to adopt the plan and take action.
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本段是一个总分的结构。开头提出论点,即好的领导人不会被事情牵着走,而是未雨绸缪,并且尽量从事件中得到而不是耗损。后面对论点进行了进一步解释,举学生会主席处理学校与社区之间的矛盾的例子说明。 |
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本段是文章第二段,提出了正文的第一个支持论点。 |
A good leader takes the initiative. Good leaders must be action-oriented. Having taken the initiative, they must see the job though to completion. They have to take charge and lead the followers. They have to motivate and encourage them. In our example, the student followers must understand why good relations with the community are necessary, and what benefit it will provide them. The followers must be persuaded to do something about it.
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总分的结构,开头提出论点,即好的领导人握有主动权,并且是行动导向的人。后面对论点进行了进一步解释,领导者的这些素质在团队中起到什么样的作用。 |
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本段是文章第三段,提出了正文的第二个支持论点。 |
I enjoy taking the initiative, determining a group’s direction, and being responsible for the actions of the group. I don’t want to suffer through other people’s stupid decisions. If there are going to be stupid ways to do something, let them be mine and let me take responsibility for them. Don’t you agree?
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第一句话总述上文提到的领导者的素质和角色,随后表明自己的立场,再次强调论点。 |
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本段是文章的尾段,承接了上文,总结了观点,并重新陈述了作者立场。 |
满分要素剖析
一、 语言表达
本文的语言规整,生动,作者对于各种动词的掌握和连续排比式的使用使得文章的论证也带有强主导性的色彩,读者感到此刻作者就是这篇文章的主导人,掌控全局。而动词的使用也给文章带来了生动性,大家还可以在其中找到很多替代平常表达的高级词汇,词组。
1、Some followers may approve of the decision, and others may complain about it, but these followers all chose to follow, not to lead. 此句中的动词approve of同意,通过;complain about抱怨,投诉;follow跟随,同意和lead引导,领导都是很好的动词表达。
2、Good leader do not react to events, but will anticipate them and seek for ways to gain from them. A leader will formulate a plan of action and then will persuade others to follow. 这句话的亮点同样也是一连串的动词表达:react to对…做反应,类似于respond to;anticipate预料,预感,先于…行动;seek for寻找,类似于look for;gain得到,收获;formulate构想,规划出,相似的表达还有come up with,比较常见的简单的表达就是make a plan;persuade劝说,劝服。
3、A good leader takes the initiative. Good leaders must be action-oriented. 掌握主导权,作者用了take the initiative,而表示行动导向用了action-oriented这种复合型的形容词,后缀oriented前面可以自由组合其它词语,表示以…为导向的。
二、 逻辑结构
本文首先回应题目问题,表明自己偏向leader的选择,然后顺势进入理由的说明,首先分两个方面说明领导人应有的素质和他们的行事方式,最后总结自己很享受leader这个角色所带来的责任感和做决断的角色,完成全文论证。这是一个循序渐进的论证方式,一步一步,从说明自己对于领导人这个角色的理解,到自己期待和享受领导人这个角色,是有组织有结构的论证过程。全文是总分总的结构,分论点段落采用的是总分的结构。
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