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Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age and should spend most of their time on school studies. Others believe that young children should spend most of their time playing. Compare these two views. Which view do you agree with? Why?
The first priority always is the well-being of the child. There are benefits to both studying and playing, but the answer depends on the details of the situation.
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此段结构 |
本段是一个分总的结构,告诉我们教育孩子应该因情况讨论。第一句引出作者讨论此问题的核心问题,即任何选择都要以孩子的健康发展为重。 |
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本段是文章首段,引出要讨论内容,帮助作者陈述观点,摆明立场。 |
There are many things that could affect the outcome. What kind of a school is it? It could be a school where children sit at their desks and engage in memorizing endless reams of useless information. Or it could be a school where the teacher helps the children learn what students want to learn. I think the second kind is significantly better for a child than the first kind.
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本段第一句话引出了本段要讨论的问题,即很多因素都会影响结果。第二句话进行设问。第三句话以及之后的句子作者都在自问自答第二句的抛出的问题,所以提出了两种情况,告诉了我们孩子在学校的一些事情,第一是填鸭式教育,第二种是灵活的教育方式,老师通过帮助孩子能让孩子学习到他们想学习到的东西。最后得出了结论,认为老师帮助学生学习他们想要的更好。 |
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本段是文章的第二段,也就是正文第一段,写了支持作者立场的第一个分论点。 |
Similarly, what kind of play is the best play? The child could be alone all day long watching television. This is a very unprofitable and isolating activity. Or the child could be involved in cooperative games with neighborhood children of the same age, which could help him or her learn how to get along with others.
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本段是一个分总的结构。主要是讨论什么样的play对于孩子才是健康向上的,结构同上一段,最后一句话是本段分论点。 |
此段功能 |
本段是文章的第三段,也就是正文第二段,写了支持作者立场的第二个分论点,即那些与同龄孩子之间合作互动的游戏对于孩子的成长才是健康有益的。 |
I think both study and play are valuable, so I would prefer to send my child to a school, where there are both. I think a variety of engaging activities makes learning easier all people of all ages.
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本段第一句话对上文进行了总结,并且重申作者论点,即教育孩子的因情况而定,但作者支持送孩子上学。那么第二句话告诉了我们学校的engaging activities 适合全年龄儿童。 |
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本段是文章的尾段,承接上文,重申论点。 |
满分要素剖析
一、语言表达
1. There are many things that could affect the outcome. 这句话是个简单的限定性定语从句,that could affect the outcome修饰things,而从句中引导词that做的是主语。这句话的功能是引出下文,这里的many things就指的是the reasons或是the causes。
2. It could be a school where children sit at their desks and engage in memorizing endless reams of useless information. Or it could be a school where the teacher helps the children learn what students want to learn.这句话就是对第一句话的分开举例,即the first reason.除了在逻辑上两个层次紧密相连,在辞藻搭配上这句话也是处处亮点。如文章多处用到could be 作谓语,原因是笔者在这里也完全不确定school一定是文中所列举的那样,只能用比较委婉的语气来回答自己的问题What kind of a school is it? 之后的定语从句where children sit at their desks and engage in memorizing endless reams of useless information.是个极好的句子,引导词where做状语。这其中有很多精彩的细节描写,如sit at their desks这样的描写就很具体,让读者脑海中瞬间有了一幅当年做学生时坐在课桌旁的画卷。之后对大量无用信息的死板记忆engage in memorizing endless reams of useless information,其中engage in doing sth可译为忙于做某事,或置身于某事,类似用法be involved in doing sth。对于学生记忆的知识,作者用两个词进行修饰endless和useless,其中useless是个负面的词汇,这里体现了作者对这种填鸭式教育的负面态度,不给予支持。
3. Or the child could be involved in cooperative games with neighborhood children of the same age, which could help him or her learn how to get along with others.这里的句式类似上句,对应的也是非常工整,be involved in等同于上句的engage in doing sth…逗号之后的定语从句在语法上称作是非限定性定语从句,引导词代替的是逗号之前所有的内容,并在从句中作主语,定语从句中又嵌套了宾语从句how to get along with others.
二、逻辑结构
本文的逻辑结构非常值得学习,作者没有按照刻板僵化的传统逻辑结构来论述,因为作者考虑到了现实生活中的实际性。在孩子教育这方面,没有只有学习或是玩的绝对化选择,在学习方式和玩耍类别上也有各种不同的选择,作者明智地对其进行了分别的论述,并且一直围绕着一个核心问题,即The first priority always is the well-being of the child. 第一段作者提出核心问题,一切以孩子的健康发展为重心,并且很多时候要依情况而定。以下的正文完全都是在论述各种情况details,并且把重点放在孩子本身的健康发展上面,环环相扣。
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