托福写作185题库独立范文及解析:第83题

2022-05-19 20:45:19

  为了提高

  Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Modern technology is creating a single world culture. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

  In modern society, technology has brought us amazing surprises everyday. Someone claims that modern technology is creating a single world culture. I completely disagree with this statement. I will list some of my reasons here.

 

内容

详细条目

段落

此段结构

首段,第一句话提出背景,第二句话对背景进行延伸,提出对方观点,现代技术将世界变得单一化,第三句话表明自己的观点。

此段功能

首段为文章提供了背景,陈述了作者论点。

  Firstly, I believe that modern technology has improved multi-culturalism and the communication between cultures. With modern communication technology such as TVs and phones, we can see what people at the other end of the world are doing, and with a modern airplane, we can travel to every corner of the world. This will greatly help us understand the cultural diversity of this world, and we will learn to appreciate the cultural difference of people from different part of the earth.

 

内容

详细条目

段落

此段结构

本段是一个总分的结构。开头提出两个分论点,即现代技术带给社会的是多元化和不同文化之间交流的机会。后面对第一个论点,即技术促进社会多元化进行了进一步解释,举例说明技术如何给我们创造了解不同文化的机会。

此段功能

本段是文章第二段,提出了正文的第一个支持论点。

  Secondly, modern technology increases the communication between cultures. Eastern people can learn good virtue from western culture such as politeness and self-cultivation; and western people can also learn a great deal of good virtual from eastern culture such as modesty and filial pity of one’s parents. By communication, one culture can learn from other culture and evolve.

 

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详细条目

段落

此段结构

总分的结构,开头提出论点,即现代技术增进不同文化之间交流的机会。后面对论点进行了进一步解释,增进交流使得不同文化之间可以互相学习,取长补短。而后举例具体说明,东西方之间可以在哪些方面互相学习。

此段功能

本段是文章第三段,提出了正文的第二个支持论点。

  Thirdly, modern technology helps us to preserve our cultural relics and world treasures, and discover our culture in the past. We can also explore and discover more about our past, and have a better understanding of now and the future. For instance, Xi’an is famous for its figures of warriors and horses buried in the emperor’s tombs. In the modern world, we explore some of these tombs so that we would understand the remote and longstanding culture of Qin Dynasty in China’s history.

 

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详细条目

段落

此段结构

总分的结构,开头提出论点,即现代技术可以帮助世界文化遗产的保护,以及增进我们对于历史的认识。后面对论点进行了进一步解释。而后用西安对于秦朝遗产的保存和研究的例子进行例证,支持了分论点。

此段功能

本段是文章第四段,提出了正文的第三个支持论点。

  Indeed, modern technology has shorten the distance between cultures, and made this world smaller. But we cannot say that it is creating a single world culture. On the contrary, with the help of modern technology, we find this world more and more diversify and colorful.

 

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详细条目

段落

此段结构

本段第一句话进行了让步,说明现代技术的确减少了时空感,让世界变得更小,第二句话用转折告诉了我们距离的缩短并不意味着世界文化的单一化。最后总结个人论点,世界在技术的进步下越发显示出它的多元化。

此段功能

本段是文章的尾段,承接了上文,总结了观点,并重新陈述了作者立场。

  满分要素剖析:

  一、 语言表达

  本文语句的使用都比较简单,多为简单句,少长难句,词汇也都是以常见词汇为主,但是作者运用这些简单的表达准确传达了自己的观点,并且进行了有条理的论证。

  1. With modern communication technology such as TVs and phones, we can see what people at the other end of the world are doing, and with a modern airplane, we can travel to every corner of the world. 这一句话是由有一模一样结构的两个部分组成,在这里,with的结构被提前到主句之前,更加强调现代科技在我们的生活中所扮演的角色。

  2. Thirdly, modern technology helps us to preserve our cultural relics and world treasures, and discover our culture in the past. 这是一个十足的简单句,但是一连串的动词搭配都值得学习,比如preserve cultural relics,discover culture in the past。另外,thirdly也是比较简单常用的提出分论点的连接副词,帮助梳理文章的论证逻辑。

  3. Indeed, modern technology has shorten the distance between cultures, and made this world smaller. 这同样是一个简单句,开头用indeed肯定了现代科技为缩短时空距离做出的贡献,shorten简洁地表达距离的缩短。

  二、 逻辑结构

  文章采用了从正面论证的手法,结尾处稍有让步,清晰地表达了自己的支持理由和论据。分论点之间语义有重复,比如第一个分论点就包含了第二个分论点,如果能更清楚地梳理好分论点之间的关系,分配好它们的角色,就会更上一层楼。

  全文的架构是总分总的结构,每个段落也是采用的总分的结构,先提出中心句,然后展开论证。

  独立写作185题库是ETS公布的托福考试经典官方作文题库,收录在托福考试官方指南(Official Guide)的附录中,在托福考试改革之前,是作文真题的主要来源。现在的托福考试对官方作文题目进行了扩大,但是185题库仍然和考试作文真题紧密相连,为考生提供最权威最真实的托福范文参考和写作练习。SmartStudy的教学专家对185题库的逐题讲解,从考题精读,头脑风暴,范文展示,甚至是同类题型的归纳等多个方面切入,将平面简短的文题毁灭性地分崩离析,以思路指导清晰其面貌,以生动的观点和事例丰满其个性,提供更完整更立体的试题透视途径,准确击碎写作障碍。

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