为了提高
The twentieth century saw great change. In your opinion, what is one change that should be remembered about the twentieth century? Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice.
There have been many technological and cultural changes in the twentieth century. In my opinion, all the changes have played a very important role in our lives,but the one that should be remembered is medical science. The changes in medical science are parallelto the changes in technological and cultural areas. One can move ahead only with the help of the others. We can see the results of medical advances in three areas: development of vaccines and antibiotics, expanded access to health care, and improved surgical techniques.
When medical researchers learned how to prevent disease and stop it from spreading, the quality of life for many people around the world improved. Today smallpox is a forgotten disease and vaccinations are no longer required. Polio is under control and the vaccine is widely available. The development of penicillin has helped many people recover from serious illnesses.
Although health care is not universal, even in developed countries, it is much better than it used to be. Local clinics, visiting nurses and specialty hospitals have all improved the health care ofour communities. And the level of health care is still developing.
If you are unfortunate and require surgery, you are lucky to have the surgery of today rather than even ten years ago. Now with microscopic and laser surgery, operations are more efficient. You spend less time in the hospital and you recover faster.
No matter how developed we are in the future, life is still always the most important aspect. There is no other change that has affected the lives of so many people. We all are thankful for advances in the area of medical science, and because of the development in medical science men have had enough courage to deal with SARS today.
满分要素剖析
一、语言表达
1、We all are thankful for advances in the area of medical science, and because of the development in medical science men have had enough courage to deal with SARS today.这句话非常长，翻译为我们都要为现在医药的发展而感到感谢，因为这样的发展给了我们更多勇气对抗sars。那么这一句话写的非常有结构感，使用了因果结构，并用and进行了连接。句中的be thankful for这个词组表示了“感谢”，比光用thank更加高端大气。
2、We can see the results of medical advances in three areas: development of vaccines and antibiotics, expanded access to health care, and improved surgical techniques. 本句话非常值得我们学习，因为这句话非常好的告诉了我们下文要写的内容。我们应当学习这种句子的写作结构，写在第一段，也就是首段的末尾，这样可以引领下文，告诉读者下面要讨论的内容。
3、Local clinics, visiting nurses and specialty hospitals have all improved the health care of our communities. 这句话写的比较优美，句式非常多样，有插入的方法，指的我们借鉴。多变的句式是文章得高分的必要点。
二、逻辑结构
文章是总分总的结构，同样也是正正正的结构，三个正面叙述的段落很好的支持了总论点。这里没有让步，属于一个绝对型的文章，实际中我们并不提倡，如果可以的话，还是在两个正面叙述段后加一个补段。但是本文理由非常充分，不失为一篇简单的满分文章。
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