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”When people succeed, it is because of hard work, Luck has nothing to do with success.” Do you agree or disagree with the quotation above? Use specific and examples to explain your position.
When people succeed, it is because of hard work, but luck has a lot to do with it, too. Success without some luck is almost impossible. The French emperor Napoleon said of one of his generals, “I know he’s good. But is he lucky?” Napoleon knew that all the hard work and talent in the world often can’t make up for bad luck. However, hard work often invites good luck.
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本段是一个分总的结构。首先第一句话提出了一个社会上错误的观点。第二句话对此进行反驳。后面引用名人名言表明作者观点,并进行升华,点出hard work often invites good luck.即好运气也是很重要的。 |
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本段是文章首段,对文章要讨论的内容提供了背景和相关的名人名言,然后点明了作者立场,并提出论点。 |
When it comes to success, luck can mean being in the right place and the right time, or having the right skills to get a job done. It might mean turning down an offer and then having a better offer come along. Nothing can replace hard work, but working hard also means keeping your eyes open, looking for possibilities and expecting the unexpected. Opportunity is often out of our control and very often depends on luck.
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本段是一个总分的结构。首先第一句话即点明了主旨。后面对此进行了分析阐述。段内进行了让步,承认了努力工作的重要性,但是告诉我们更要重视运气和机会。 |
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本段是文章的第二段,也就是正文第一段,写了支持作者立场的第一个分论点。 |
How many of the great inventions and discoveries came about through a lucky mistake or a lucky chance? One of the biggest lucky mistakes in history is Columbus’ so-called discovery of America. By doing so, he enriched his sponsors and changed history, but he was really looking for India. However, Columbus’ chance discovery wasn’t pure luck. It was backed up by years of studying and calculating. He worked hard to prove his theory that the world was round.
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本段分为两个部分。第一个部分提出了幸运的重要性,并提供了哥伦布的例子来佐证了这个观点。第二个部分进一步让步补充,即他的成功不仅仅源于幸运,也有不屑的努力。 |
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本段是文章的第三段,也就是正文第二段,写了支持作者立场的第二个分论点。 |
Success that comes from pure luck and no hard work can be a real problem. For example, consider a teenage girl who becomes a movie star. Imagine she’s been picked from nowhere because of her looks. She is going to feel very insecure, because she knows she didn’t do anything to earn her stardom. On the other hand, think about an actress who’s spent years learning and working at her craft. When she finally has good luck and becomes a success, she will handle stardom better because she knows she earned it.
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本段是一个总分的结构。首先第一句话即点明了主旨,即从幸运得来的成功可能造成问题。后面举了一个小女孩的例子佐证了分论点。 |
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本段是文章的一个让步段,告诉我们只有运气也是不行的,必须运气和努力结合。 |
People who work hard help make their own luck by being ready when opportunity knocks. When it comes to success, I think that hard work and luck go hand in hand.
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本段一共两句话,第一句话承接上文,认为幸运和努力同样重要。第二句话进一步重申了本文论点,认为我们应当做好努力与幸运之间的平衡,这样才能真正成功。 |
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本段是文章的尾段,对上文进行了承接,并对论点进行了概括分析,最后重申论点,让文章更加立场明确。 |
满分因素剖析
一、语言表达
本文语句通顺,内容充实,逻辑严谨,语言流畅。在句式方面,作者使用宾语从句,定语从句,状语从句等复合句式。同时,文章主动语态与被动语态相结合,长句短句相结合,凸显了作者的很厉害的语言功底。这些都使得文章更加吸引考官的眼球。
1. When it comes to success, luck can mean being in the right place and the right time, or having the right skills to get a job done.
此句中短语“when it comes to”意思为“当说到...,至于...”后面接名词短语,然后在主句中可以引出后面的观点。类似的用法还有“As for, in terms of”,这种表达方式比较地道,可以成为一般用法“firstly”的一个高级替代,能吸引考官老师的眼球。
2. Success that comes from pure luck and no hard work can be a real problem.
本句中,that引导定语从句,做success的定语,起修饰和说明的作用。此句的意思为“不经努力而靠运气获得的成功是真正的问题”。在立意上,作者更上一层楼,进一步探寻了努力,运气,机遇三者之间的辩证关系,告诉我们只有运气也是不行的,必须运气和努力结合,使得文章更有深度。
3. When it comes to success, I think that hard work and luck go hand in hand.
此句中,Go hand in hand意思是“相互作用,一起出现”,用来表达事物之间相互促进,相互依存的辩证关系,这种用法非常形象,hand in hand本身就有手拉手的意思。这个短语可以成为一般用法together的一种高级替代。
二、逻辑结构
本文接近于中立的观点,每一个段落都承认了努力工作的重要性,但是又着重说明了幸运在成功中的必要作用,这样的让步观点非常可取。文章逻辑严谨,结构清晰,每一段分多层次展开,内容非常充实。
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